Lick-quid

I've been having these interesting dreams lately that I will probably turn into something you can see or read. They remind me of the dreams I had about 3-2 years ago. I can't really describe a lot of them, but the feeling is kind of summer night time, wet grass, thirsty, crying and yelling but no noise, laughing, tearing and healing, blood and gunk oozing, eyes straining to stay awake, moist air, fresh smells hot breathing. Dripping, everything is dripping.

Dat is funny

Sometimes I stress myself out because I don't feel I'm making something that is really pushing my limits as a creator and that I'm not making of something of true worth. Then I see some really simple drawn cartoons and they make me squeal like a little child with delight. And then I remember thats all I'm supposed to do. Make things that make someone like me squeal like a child. After all that is something of true worth isn't it?

Here are some real sweet pictures: Click and squeal

$$$ Plans

-Rob, do it reeeeally badly so I can reap the sweet benefits of free board and food at one of New Zealand's fine min security prisons

-Sell people my old 5c coins for a buck a pop

-Make a video of me 'selling' myself, like, instead of a show reel make a real show.

I will work backwards. I'm also listening to this a lot:

Uncertain Curtain

I keep finding all of these little paragraphs I wrote from ages ago for all my little ideas that stick round. I keep noticing all of these horrific grammar mistakes I constantly make. People keep asking me what is that I do, and I can't find the words to sum me up. I keep having intense daydreams that kind of shake me and make me feel self-concince. My mumbling continually gets worse and I find it harder to keep tabs on it in everyday conversation. I keep thinking of all these different scenarios based on what people say to me, then I blurt out the punchlines to my unexplainable jokes to everyone's confusion. Its taking me longer to write my images down in succinct ways. I look at my bank account everyday and regret every cent I spend. My sleep seems constantly broken and due to constant tiredness I feel behind on all of my work that is self-directed anyway. Every time I leave my house I become increasingly more and more aware of the public looking at me. Every time I draw a cartoon I become increasingly disappointed with how it looks.

-This should be my most motivating time, boy I hope it is

Trying To Make Work Like This

Michael Fincham is just great

I would describe this website as 'a masterpiece'

http://delorean.stfu.co.nz/

Really like it

Roy Orbison pt 2

Once again I have a new computer after being without one for three or so weeks. This one is like the old one but newer and won't die as soon. Good description. I'm giving myself a B- for it. So I'm getting excited about a whole heap of things but I am really looking forward to showing off my upcoming monthly comic/mag/website F*Kittens at The ChCh Zinefest

Promise to make proper posts soon, maybe, possibly

Hire Me

http://www.odd.co.nz/#page=portfolio;id=1438;scroll=2

Get excited

www.fkittens.com

Coming soon

Fanciful plans

1. rest of the year: set myself up for next year
2. 2012, just be the best, have lotsa $$$, jokes and babes
3. Get a part time job

Roy Orbison

I woke on a Monday to get ready to fly to Auckland,  the cat was sleeping up against my warm belly. We were keeping each other warm. For a while the cat and I got in sync with each other. When I would nap/sleep so would the cat. When I ate, so did the cat. We were like an old couple. Just did what the other did, never needing to talk about it, we've had every conversation. I looked out of my window. Nothing but snow. Fuck, better check if my plane will go. Load up my laptop and, mother fucker, the laptop had died.

That was like three weeks ago. Maybe less. I'm now in Auckland (had to wait four days) and now have my laptop slowly roasting my testicles to a nice level of infertility. Making plans but no stream of revenue, so sure hope my plans and my life decisions pan out.

Listening to Roy Orbison. So life is pretty good. A plus.

Local art is still alive

I'm off to live in Auckland for a while or longer, not sure. Anyhow, this website came up on facebook. Rosa was at Fine Arts the same time I was. Her website is really nice and her paintings are great. Have a look:

http://www.rosa-scott.com/Rosa_Scott/Home.html

While I'm pimping art in Christchurch you should go have a look at this gallery. It is very good.

http://www.abcgallery.net/index.html

Finding new ways to tell that same old story

Every one likes the classic fairy stories. I do anyhow. There is something addictive about the sense of danger and sorrow in them but the simplicity and bittersweet optimism inside them always gives me a feeling of relief. I enjoy that.

 I'm doing another silent clowning show for kids by Dan Bain for the Court Theatre. Its going to be in a 700 seat venue, so, I will be interested to see how it goes. The show you ask? Hansel & Gretel.

Come if you please. Its a 'kids play' but physical comedy is for everyone. Unless of course you are a jaded bastard.

http://courttheatre.org.nz/index.cfm/0,11,279,html?previewid=286

Cartoonists

Are you one? Know one? Wanna get stuff out there? Send me an email, might have a way

48 Hours

My team did pretty well at this this year, the team had good vibes but also focus and a want to keep creating and improving. We were awarded the Runner-up in the Christchurch city final and Ballantyne and I were nominated for best actress and actor respectively. So It must be good on some level right?

Mount Pleasant - Slipped Era

Here is another music video I've done, and another for my good friend Jon Phillips

Letter to my future children #1

Sorry. I'll be better.

Sleepy Age

Here is a video that a lent a hand on, I like it

Editing

"I love editing. I think I like it more than any other phase of film making. If I wanted to be frivolous, I might say that everything that precedes editing is merely a way of producing film to edit." - S. Kubrick

Internet drawing

Guess its the new way to draw on your computer. Not a huge fan of it, still enjoy pen and paper, although conflicted with the waste involved, maybe it isn't that big of a deal. I've found one sweet drawing web if your into that. Think I'm still going to keep with pen and paper as it is the best way to keep control over it as well as offering a few surprises that can be corrected. Its quick too. I recommend it too.

Anyhow, if you wanna draw on your computer I've been playing with this, its pretty good, still figuring out its kinks. Again, think its a fun thing to play with but not the answer.

http://mrdoob.com/projects/harmony/#sketchy

Really Looking Forward To This

http://josephernest.blogspot.com/p/upcoming-shows.html

I think this will be the best thing at the comedy festival this year, read the pamphlet for the festival, and this really really looks like my cup of tea. So it should be yours too

News Like Story About That Show I'm Doing

Playing With Pictures from Metro News on Vimeo.

Grouper - Alien Observer

Here is a video I made for Grouper under the advisement of Liz Harris, DOP by Julian Vares, assistant directed by Naoko Miyamoto staring Alice May Connolly and Kathleen Burns. I directed and edited.




http://vimeo.com/22540856

48 seconds

Here is something I did last week:

Positivity is still alive

Today for dinner I went to Welcome. If you haven't been to Welcome Restaurant I recommend it. Big fan. Anyhow there was the owners 23 month year old child walking around the kitchen and while I was waiting for my order (I think 23, Tofu vegetables with noodles in a tasty sauce and a bag of mushroom jerky) she came out from behind the counter. She looked up at me and we stared off for a while, then I started to copy her hand movements. At first she wasn't sure what I was up to, Then she cottoned on. After a while of this she snapped her hand into her sleeve. I looked surprised and asked her where her hand went. She then smiled a giant grin and popped it back out. Showing it to me in triumph, I acted casual and relieved, then, her hand went missing. I think we played this loop for ten minutes. At the end of the game she had added in losing balance when she was missing her hand and we pretended to eat dinner with each other at one of the tables. Her dad became our pleased audience and seemed to be pretty proud of his social and inventive child. I would be too.

I'm glad that comedy isn't dead, I'm glad routines have new places to go, and I'm glad a 23 year old man can play a silly game with a 23 month year old girl like" where did your hand go, oh, there it is. Oh where did your hand go ect."

New Kids Show for Everyone

http://www.playwithpicturesnz.com/

COME!

Funky

Underground ChCh. Seamass

Robotic Organic # 5 by seamass

Kinky Boots/Mr.T

For a while I was obsessed with novelty songs. It didn't last long. The novelty, did in fact, wore off. This is one the songs I was obsessed with. The part I find most disturbing/distressing is when he says sexy little school girls and it has a picture of innocent little kids.



Luckily however you can wash it away with Mr. T

Dunedin Fringe

About to do two shows, why don't you come to both. I think they will be good

The year has only begun

Jeeeeeeze, The year has been ticking by and there is still a lot to do! The earthquake has put me into a more questionable situation  than before. Luckily however I have always planned to be largely self-employed. Still waiting to see if it will pay off. I have some ambitious plans for this year and I want to see them through. This may be my poorest year yet but I'm ok with that. I've never really needed that much. Tea, coffee, toast, paper and a pen is one way to make me content. The next immediate thing is the Dunedin Fringe with two shows, one a night time improv show about love, and another a weekend daytime show about fairy tales. I'm pretty excited about doing something different again and I think it will be fun to do. I'm also in development mode, I have a short stop-motion/puppet film that has been in the back of my head for some time that I want to start this year, a plan to make a visual novel with my talented friend Charlotte Adams, a puppet play with another talented friend Ruby Read, a few feature length film ideas that I will most likely do with a third talented friend Julian Vares a few ideas I want to do with Eli Matthewson, a comedy show that I will need to train for and another full length play I want to get running at the end of the year. Oh, yeah, and I want to start a cheap comic book.

CAN I DO IT??????

WILL ANYONE WANT TO SEE ANY OF THIS?

Rad Babes Eating

Real post modern eh?

http://babeeat.tumblr.com/

I made the video ages ago, and now I turned it into a music video for Jon, who now lives in Wellington. I think I will miss him. This has four of my good friends in it. I'm all about my friends at the moment. They ain't bad.

Surreal

An earthquake hit my home town destroying our central business district, destroying people's homes and killing people. I'm lucky, my house seems ok and I didn't have to go too long without power or water. I'm boiling all the water and using my backyard as a toilet. Yesterday I heard them fixing the rails near my house. The road near my house is a main vein and usually you can hear the constant hum of cars. On Tuesday when it hit all you could hear was the traffic as both lanes were stuck in gridlock traffic as everyone tried to get home. These last few days you can't hear anything. It is a bit too quiet. The news tells me to stay at home, but I wish I could do more, but what can I do? You get the feeling that everyone is in a state of unknown. A lot of people are thinking of leaving. If there are no jobs from them why would you stay. The fact that the city in which I walk around everyday is now, well, gone, is strange. The fact that people are dead confuses me more. I want to reach out and help and make people feel better. Can you really do that through art? Maybe. I want to stick around and start creating things to offset all the destruction, I want to bring more joy into a city that has been my home for the last 19 years, in a region I've lived my entire life. But right now that seems futile. Will it ever really help? Peoples reactions seem to vary to it. Some people left, some people just stayed not knowing what to do, I saw people lining up at petrol stations that were closed, I saw a woman pile up a supermarket trolly with all the bread she could at 11am, while another just brought three packs of cigarets, I saw a woman close to tears just walking around at night. What is Christchurch going to be now? I go to Auckland tomorrow to do a fringe show, and then to Dunedin soon after that coming back to Christchurch in between. Feel guilty for leaving. After that I want to help Christchurch rebuild and recover. But how? What is it that I can do? I guess I will find out soon. I hope I can do something. Anything.

Please Come!

Nelson:6:17am

McDonald's has free wireless and is open 24 hours in Nelson. Crazy. Feel like a bit of a yuppie wearing my suit jacket and tapping away at a laptop while sipping on my cheap coffee, but hey, maybe I am.

The Boss is playing. Makes me think of J.Phillips and the fact I promised him a cover and never delivered. Although I'm not sure if I did promise. I have rethought how to do the film that will star him. Should be better. Simplifying my ideas.

Nelson was fun, Lisa and Dan and all the Body and Space guys looked after me as well as my family up here. Very spoiled. The show seems to have been successful. An estimated 400 - 500 people attending the last show and they were kind enough to give us a standing ovation. Felt weird to receive for prancing around.

Now its time to get my fringe show as perfect as I can. I think it will be surprising and I think its cheap enough that people will take a risk on it. I hope so. Me and Eli really just want to make something we are proud of. Sure hope we do. Otherwise it will be a long walk of shame. I believe in it.

Should be on the up-coming bit of my blog soon, or now even.

Really sad I missed out on Johnny and Abby's wedding though. Think I will bake for them. I never bake, but I will for them.

The New Year

So I haven't typed on here in a few weeks or so, I guess my hordes of fans are probably wondering if I'm dead in a gutter somewhere,  the skin of my face lost of all moisture and muscle now stuck to my dry skull while my dead eyes bulge out of it just staring at the dark grimy wall in front of me. My stomach bloated and cut open with my half eaten guts just spilled on the alleyway wall where my competitors just left me to be eaten by the skinny starving dogs, their owners long dead, their bellies now full of what used to be my digestive system.

But I'm not. So fear not fan base. And by fan base I mean my loyal friend who checks here now and again.

I'm in Nelson, about to start performances of The Complete Works of William Shakespeare (abridged). If you want to know more details click on the upcoming performances or go down and click on the Dan Allen and Lisa Norriss button.

It was written the same year I was born. It is written by improvisers. So I should be ok at it yeah?

Here is a picture of one of the animals I get to hang out at my uncle and aunties place. It is really nice, out in Motueka, on top of a hill with the mountains behind you and the sea off in the distance. Its really the life. Very hot.

I also have my very own show to promote soon, but I will dedicate a whole post to that.